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May 29, 2009

I want you to know I had a hard time


One day two or maybe three years ago, my father fell and broke his neck. I recieved a phone call from Dad's wife, Jackie, to tell me that my father had fallen and was on his way to the hospital via ambulance. When I finally made it to the hospital I heard the worst, which was that Dad had broken his neck and was paralized, he would soon be having surgery. Finally, the surgery was over and two months had gone by, but still Dad was in the hospital. He'd be coming home in a couple of weeks. The doctor explained to the family the things that would have to take place before Dad could go home. I felt that since he was Dad, and I was the oldest son, it was my duty to move to Dad's home to be his caretaker. It was something that I felt I had to do. I was promised by Dad's wife, Jackie, that while I was there she would take me to my own appointments because I didn't have a drivers license or even a car to drive.



Before moving to my father's house, I was told that I would lose my section eight and I'd not be allowed to go back to Orchard Knolls if living with dad didn't work out but, I was positive that it would work. I packed everything up and moved to Dad's house in Sutherlin, Oregon. On June 08, 2006 Dad came home from the hospital. Life as Dad's care provider started. In the begining it was okay, I had help from Jadckie, Dad,s wife, but soon Jackie decided that she was no longer going to help, it was my job to be Dad's care provider twenty four seven. Everything that Dad, Jackie and I had agreed on went out the window. It was now up to me to get him dressed, washed, and cleaned up for his appointments and therapy appointments also. Dad was unable to go to the toilet without someone helping, Jackie started having problems with that. Also, she started name calling and ignoring Dad when he would call her. I didn't like that at all and started to call her on it. Soon Dad told me I had to leave, therefore I lost everything that I had given up to be of help to him, my apartment, my section eight, and my independence. I had lived on my own for many years in a very nice apartment and now, since I was disabled myself with COPD, and on a limited income, I was unable to rent an apartment without the help of section eight. Now I was dependent on friends and family.


July first of 2008 my father passed away sometime in the night while sleeping. Jackie his wife found him the next morning , by the time she found him he was gone. I'd say it was probably the hardest thing I have ever gone through, because while helping him I could see him suffering, trying to accept the fact that he would probably never walk again. It was very hard for him to accept. Soon his smile seemed to dissapear from his face, it was like he forgot to smile anymore. I told him once, "Dad, I miss seeing you smile and I really miss hearing you whistle the songs you were always whistling". Oh how I wish I could hear him whistle now.


I lived with a friend for awhile after I had to leave Dad's. She decided one day it was time for me to leave, I had nowhere to go, I had nowhere to live. My oldest sister invited me to live with her family. I moved to her house in Bakersfield, California on November 19, 2007. I was there for three months and started having mental anxiety and needed to leave Bakersfield. Another sister invited me to live with her and her husband in Agua Dulce, California.


I believe that everything happens for a reason. Throughout the years I have been a religious person but always wondered, down in my heart, if I was worshiping the true God. I remember it being a question in my mind for many years. The reason for this was that I felt my life was unproductive, even though I went to church every Sunday and even went door to door every week, spending as much as thirty five to forty hours a week knocking on doors looking for interested people. Finally I reached the point that I stopped worshiping God. The biggest trial in my life was Dad breaking his neck, then losing him, and me losing everything I had, everything I owned gone in just a matter of a few days. I then moved to California seeking and finally finding Him. I believe I have the truth. I believe in my Heavenly Father and His son Jesus Christ. I believe that Jesus Christ is my savior and redeemer and he died as an atonement for my sins. I also believe that Joseph Smith is the prophet chosen by my Heavenly Father to restore His Gospel to the earth.










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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love that video. Thanks for sharing :o) ~April